What does it mean to live authentically?
Perhaps it begins with a willingness to meet ourselves honestly, to listen to what matters to us, recognise what feels true, honour our boundaries and make choices that are aligned with our values.
Authenticity is often spoken about as though it means saying exactly what we think, refusing to compromise, and unapologetically being ourselves. But I believe there is a deeper and more nuanced form of authenticity.
Living authentically is not about saying everything we think. It is about learning to live in a way that does not require us to abandon ourselves. It asks us to speak with integrity, while remembering that our truth is not necessarily the only truth.
It asks us to stand firmly in ourselves without needing to stand above anyone else.
And perhaps most importantly, it asks us to develop enough self-trust that we no longer need everyone around us to validate who we are.
The false self can be protective
It is easy to say “be yourself” until being yourself risks disappointing someone. Or taking up space and being visible makes others feel threatened by your presence. Learning how to speak your truth can mean allowing yourself to be seen differently - especially if you have spent years becoming the version of yourself that others expected.
Many of us learn to edit ourselves to feel accepted. That may have protected you at one point. But eventually, it can become difficult to tell where other people’s expectations end and you begin.
These adaptations can be understandable, particularly when they developed in environments where being fully yourself did not always feel safe or welcomed. Overtime this can create a quiet form of self-abandonment. Where we become disconnected from our own preferences, values, instincts and desires all because we have spent so much time orientating ourselves around everyone else’s.
Finding your authentic self means starting to notice that difference. Learning to trust yourself begins with listening again, and recognising that your intuition does not have to shout to be worth listening to.
Truth is not permission to become rigid
Living authentically does not equate to saying everything you think or assuming you are always right.
You can stand by what matters to you while remaining open to another perspective. Your experiences are real. Your feelings are real. Your values matter. Your boundaries matter. And at the same time, other people have their own experiences, histories, perceptions and ways of understanding the world.
Authentic communication requires both self-honesty and humility.
A shamanic perspective
From a shamanic perspective, authenticity is not just understood as “being yourself” but learning to live more closely connected to the dream of life seeded within the soul. For me, the idea of following the thread of the soul speaks to something deeply human, of finding our unique story, to live our unique purpose and to offer our dharma back to the world. It calls us to greater meaning, aliveness, authenticity and integrity.
For Kristy, this inner work can also be part of finding your soul purpose and understanding what genuinely feels like yours to follow.
A grounded practice
Authentic living requires room for change. We are continually shaped by experience. Our relationships change. Our circumstances change. Our understanding deepens. We encounter new information. We grow. A mature sense of self has enough stability to know who we are while remaining flexible enough to evolve.
So if you are wondering how to follow your spiritual path, begin with what already feels true. Notice when you make yourself smaller. Pay attention to what repeatedly pulls at you. Then practice acting on that inner knowing in small and consistent ways.
Next step
Living authentically means beginning to reverse certain patterns and making self-honouring and self-directed choices. It is having the courage to be fully and authentically yourself. If you are working on your voice and personal power, explore Soul Retrieval or Shamanic Healing, or book a session with Kristy.
